AUDREY HEPBURN AND MARILYN MONROE: LOOKING FOR LOVE IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES

News flash!! Most young girls across America say Marilyn Monroe is their all-time hero. Elegant Audrey Hepburn comes in a distant second in the Screen Goddess Sweepstakes. We demand a recount. Let's take a closer look at both actresses.

Marilyn Monroe's horrendous beginning PARALYZED her right up to the end of her life. During her childhood, Marilyn endured the tyranny of her mother's mental illness. Unloved. Shuffled to many abusive foster homes. Stripped of her dignity and any shred of safety.

She dreamed of a fame that would bring her the love of millions. She got it, but it was no fairytale.

Gossip columnist Walter Winchell once wrote: "Hollywood is a place where they put you under contract instead of under observation." Well, that wasn't true for Marilyn.

Marilyn freely admitted she did the "Monica Lewinsky" for years with agents, producers, studio moguls and a cast of thousands, before landing a coveted studio contract. Finally, she signed with 20th Century Fox and wearily declared: "That's the last time I'll ever be on my knees!"

She got her studio contract AND was placed under observation many times, in many psychiatric clinics. An alphabet soup of mental maladies plagued her. Depression. Suicidal tendencies. Alcoholism. Drug addiction. Sex addiction. Instead of a handshake, a simple thank you, or a kiss on the cheek, Marilyn had sex with you.

As a fully grown sex symbol, Marilyn Monroe inflicted the tyranny of her mental illness on co-stars and directors. Her insecurities, fueled by sleeping pills and booze, led to hopeless depression and legendary bad behavior. Lateness to the set or a no-show. Flubbed lines. Millions of studio dollars lost.

The movies made her a celluloid idol, but left many battlefield casualties. Cast and crew always suffered from Marilyn fatigue in all its ugly incarnations.

Poor Marilyn. The star didn't even live like a movie queen. Her personal hygiene was woefully lacking. She rarely bathed. She never owned a home until months before her death at age 36. The screen goddess apparently washed down dozens of sleeping pills with a magnum of champagne. Found disheveled and nude in the middle of her bedroom floor on a bare mattress, the room was a squalid mess.

No one who personally knew Marilyn registered surprise at her early demise.

Marilyn Monroe's last words were to an actor friend, Peter Lawford: "Please say goodbye to...", aka a serial cheater, married lover who dumped her months before and passed her on to his brother. The lover happened to be the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. Thus began speculation that she was murdered with Nembutal suppositories to silence any blabbing to the press.

Sadly, it seems Marilyn's magic was only on the screen.

While Marilyn's bleak childhood paralyzed her, Audrey Hepburn's early tragedies GALVANIZED her, and she grew up to become an extraordinary human being.

Audrey sprinkled her magic everywhere, everyday of her life. Everyone always fell in love with her and admired her forever.

Audrey Hepburn came of age during the bloody Nazi occupation of Holland. Stripped of its dignity and any shred of safety, her homeland sank into despair. Though born to a Dutch baroness, Audrey's family suffered the same fate as the commoners.

While a Jewish teenager named Anne Frank hid in an Amsterdam attic writing the dairy that would one day inspire the world, 15-year old Audrey joined the Dutch Resistance.

She carried secret messages in her ballet slippers, knowing that if caught, the Nazis would shoot her. That took a lot of guts, especially since the Gestapo executed her two favorite uncles months before for similar heroics.

Food became a distant memory for Audrey. Forced starvation, not anorexia, made the future fashion original skeletal. The young girl stayed alive by eating tulip bulbs. Her metabolism changed, stomach problems began and her weight remained at 110 pounds for the rest of her life.

Being born into the European aristocracy is not what gave Audrey Hepburn a fairytale life. Her banker father deserted the family. The warm and sensitive Audrey endured a cold and distant mother, who was now forced to take in work as a seamstress. Ironically, Marilyn's mother worked as a studio seamstress.

Even after Audrey's triumphs on the stage and in the movies, her shrewish mother told her: "Considering that you have no talent, it's really extraordinary where you've gotten."

Still, the saintly actress harbored no malice, ever. She took care of both parents until their deaths.

In a twist of fate, Audrey's most cherished role as Holly Golightly in "Breakfast at Tiffany's" was written by the book's author, Truman Capote, with Marilyn Monroe in mind for the film role.

But Audrey's easy charm and inimitable fashion sense, abetted by French designer Givenchy, won the day. The actress ended up with an Oscar nomination and also sang the Oscar-winning song, "Moon River". Today, "Breakfast at Tiffany's" is an icon in the vault of stylish cinema.

Audrey often said: "I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it." She fulfilled these needs with her sons, her circle of friends, and with those suffering all over the globe.

Twenty years before Angelina Jolie signed up with the United Nations, Audrey began her charity work with its UNICEF branch. She just had to pay back for the life-saving help she got from the Red Cross as a teen in war torn Europe.

Audrey Hepburn eased the suffering of countless children throughout Africa, Asia, and South America with her relentless perseverance and tireless UN relief trips.

"I'm glad I've got a name and I'm using it for all its worth. It's a bonus that my career gave me," she said right before leaving for her final trip in 1993 to famine-struck Somalia. She worked long and hard under grueling conditions to help save the African children and their families from certain extinction.

On her return home, doctors made a shocking discovery. Audrey had only three months left.

Her son Sean Ferrer recalled that, "Even on the day she died, her very last thoughts were with the children. She wanted to know if there were any messages about the children in Somalia. Mommy believed in love. She left us with peace."

Yes, we all will make the decision at some point in our lives to be paralyzed or galvanized by the dark shadows of our past. Choose to walk in the sunshine.

Be a hero, like Audrey Hepburn.

(c)2006, Sistarrs International